When you are least expecting it, like a breath of amusing air, suddenly, out of the blues, something happens, or someone does, or says stuff, which amazes & intrigues you, & tickles the imagination. That’s when u wish u could hit the ‘pause’ button, to freeze that moment, rewind, & play, again & again …..
*This dates back to when Ashok & I were working together as sales officers. Sales plummeted, the company folded up, (yours truly & my partner-in-crime heartily contributed to the collapse I suspect!), but we survived to tell this tale … we were a motley bunch of sales reps, mainly guys & a few gals, (who got a lot of attention, less because of who they were, & mainly thanx to the ‘demand supply ratio’!) Then the “Vaa vaa voom” factor came in the form of this ex-beauty queen who joined the office - she oozed sex-appeal, was well endowed, & set the male hearts on fire. Us plain Janes were rudely thrust aside, & to add insult to injury, they even asked us advice on how to ‘pataao’ the beauty queen!
*The early morning rush was on in the office – getting your reports in, confirming appointments, routine correspondence …. All this was happening in a large room where the sales staff was gearing up for the day ahead when …. in walked “Ms Bold & Beautiful”, pouting, & she loudly declared, “Help, I desperately need a screw!” There was pin-drop silence, & only the panting of all the male puppies could be heard! Our gorgeous gal, (did I mention that the Maker, while ‘well-endowing’ her, kinda missed the brain area!), oblivious to the fact that she had caused the room temperature to shoot up, repeated, in case we had missed it the first time, “can someone give me a screw?!”
*The disbelieving, but joyous hush was merely a lull before the storm! The guys hastily gravitated towards her, like bees swarming around a pot of honey! We could see nothing, except a huddle of unruly guys, desperately trying to get to her first! Then the dampener: Ms Vaa Vaa Voom explained that one of the screws of her earrings had fallen off & got lost, & that unfortunately, was the ‘screw’ she was frantically seeking!
*What a laugh we gals had, at the expense of these Romeos, who slunk away sheepishly, with their tails b/w their legs! Always a great memory to chuckle about when I’m feeling low!
*U’ll be surprised to know that Ashok, despite selling cigarettes for a living during his stint at ITC, remained a non-smoker …. I think I know why!
*We were like puppies in training in our first job – That’s when u actually look forward to going to work! Personally, I was like a kid who was play-acting in a grown up world – I loved donning the persona of a seasoned, veteran sales person – the tense target meetings, the huddle with your supervisor, & zooming away from the office, only to re-group with your colleagues, at the nearest coffee shop!
*Among us eager young things was this thirty year old senior, and he was our ‘Guru’ – he taught us all there was to know about the big bad world of sales – the afternoon siestas at home, remembering to crumple your clothes before u got back to the office, to sport the over-worked, weary look, the mid-morning movie shows, tailor made for slackers like us …. fondly remember my induction into this murky land – it was a one way ticket, & strictly ‘no return’!!
*And then …. the veteran revealed he had feet of clay, and how! Hanging out over a cup of coffee, de Guru pulled out a cigarette – when we firmly asked him not to smoke, he reluctantly put it away, & then proceeded to elaborate on a unique theory he had – apparently, according to him, it was not the nicotine which was the culprit. It was the sensation of the cigarette in your mouth, which he claimed, was identical to a baby suckling milk!!
*A stunned & disbelieving silence greeted this declaration! Would like to inform you that there were two females in this group, both who years later are still reeling & tottering! Of course, Aristotle was oblivious to our discomfort & went on to wax eloquently about how while a child, esp the male child was physically weaned away from momma’s milk, mentally he still craved it. Cigarettes, he announced were an answer to this!!
*Needless to say, that day, we all aged & that bridged the gap between us juniors and the “senior’ – a safe distance was maintained & we added ‘deftly avoiding being left alone with him’ to our job description!
*That’s how Ashok remained a non-smoker in ITC!!!
*This dates back to when Ashok & I were working together as sales officers. Sales plummeted, the company folded up, (yours truly & my partner-in-crime heartily contributed to the collapse I suspect!), but we survived to tell this tale … we were a motley bunch of sales reps, mainly guys & a few gals, (who got a lot of attention, less because of who they were, & mainly thanx to the ‘demand supply ratio’!) Then the “Vaa vaa voom” factor came in the form of this ex-beauty queen who joined the office - she oozed sex-appeal, was well endowed, & set the male hearts on fire. Us plain Janes were rudely thrust aside, & to add insult to injury, they even asked us advice on how to ‘pataao’ the beauty queen!
*The early morning rush was on in the office – getting your reports in, confirming appointments, routine correspondence …. All this was happening in a large room where the sales staff was gearing up for the day ahead when …. in walked “Ms Bold & Beautiful”, pouting, & she loudly declared, “Help, I desperately need a screw!” There was pin-drop silence, & only the panting of all the male puppies could be heard! Our gorgeous gal, (did I mention that the Maker, while ‘well-endowing’ her, kinda missed the brain area!), oblivious to the fact that she had caused the room temperature to shoot up, repeated, in case we had missed it the first time, “can someone give me a screw?!”
*The disbelieving, but joyous hush was merely a lull before the storm! The guys hastily gravitated towards her, like bees swarming around a pot of honey! We could see nothing, except a huddle of unruly guys, desperately trying to get to her first! Then the dampener: Ms Vaa Vaa Voom explained that one of the screws of her earrings had fallen off & got lost, & that unfortunately, was the ‘screw’ she was frantically seeking!
*What a laugh we gals had, at the expense of these Romeos, who slunk away sheepishly, with their tails b/w their legs! Always a great memory to chuckle about when I’m feeling low!
*U’ll be surprised to know that Ashok, despite selling cigarettes for a living during his stint at ITC, remained a non-smoker …. I think I know why!
*We were like puppies in training in our first job – That’s when u actually look forward to going to work! Personally, I was like a kid who was play-acting in a grown up world – I loved donning the persona of a seasoned, veteran sales person – the tense target meetings, the huddle with your supervisor, & zooming away from the office, only to re-group with your colleagues, at the nearest coffee shop!
*Among us eager young things was this thirty year old senior, and he was our ‘Guru’ – he taught us all there was to know about the big bad world of sales – the afternoon siestas at home, remembering to crumple your clothes before u got back to the office, to sport the over-worked, weary look, the mid-morning movie shows, tailor made for slackers like us …. fondly remember my induction into this murky land – it was a one way ticket, & strictly ‘no return’!!
*And then …. the veteran revealed he had feet of clay, and how! Hanging out over a cup of coffee, de Guru pulled out a cigarette – when we firmly asked him not to smoke, he reluctantly put it away, & then proceeded to elaborate on a unique theory he had – apparently, according to him, it was not the nicotine which was the culprit. It was the sensation of the cigarette in your mouth, which he claimed, was identical to a baby suckling milk!!
*A stunned & disbelieving silence greeted this declaration! Would like to inform you that there were two females in this group, both who years later are still reeling & tottering! Of course, Aristotle was oblivious to our discomfort & went on to wax eloquently about how while a child, esp the male child was physically weaned away from momma’s milk, mentally he still craved it. Cigarettes, he announced were an answer to this!!
*Needless to say, that day, we all aged & that bridged the gap between us juniors and the “senior’ – a safe distance was maintained & we added ‘deftly avoiding being left alone with him’ to our job description!
*That’s how Ashok remained a non-smoker in ITC!!!
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